20 Days.........

Holy Crud, I have NOT stopped since stepping foot back home! Literally, I thought I was going to have a breakdown yesterday (which is unlike me). The good news, we had a fabulous dinner with our best "couple friends", Kyle and Mandy last night (with little baby Ava, of course joining us).

I have been really hurt and saddened by some things in my life, nothing that I will go into detail about......and you see it was really GREAT to be with good friends. Friends that know us and consider us their family. No, we are not blood, we haven't even known each other our whole lives, but they understand us. I feel truly blessed to have such great friends. There are literally over 4 girlfriends in my life that I can count on NO MATTER WHAT!! This really makes me so happy and leaves me with the feeling of knowing I am blessed!

Anyway, 20 days is Mexico!! Chris and I tell each other every day......3 weeks until Mexico, and now we can take it down a notch to 2 weeks, 6 days!!

YAY!

Please pray for Stellan as he and his momma are not doing well.....

Back Home

We are back from Ohio. Thank you to my brother and Jenn opening their home for our family. Visiting was very nice and as always it is always nice to see our niece, Julianne and sister in law, Jenn. Zach had a blast with Soak City, seeing such a small town, Dennison that we stayed for a night, and last he cannot stop talking about his uncle Shaun at Swing and Things (Thanks for doing all the fun things he asked that day)!

I really miss my brother and am very saddened that I do not get to see him often. I know that is the last trip we will probably make to Ohio because he is so busy, works a lot, and will not live there much longer. My heart also breaks that we probably will not ever be close in vicinity.

As for home, stepping off the plane was quite a shock at 103 degrees and it got as high as 105 in places! For people reading in Arizona and Southern CA, I know I am complaining about something you would consider "No Big Deal", but it was smoking to me!!

Well, saw clients this afternoon, suitcases unpacked, clothes washing, and grocery shopping complete.......boy, I need two weeks off and then shortly thereafter, Beach with great friends and then MEXICO! Whoop, Whoop!

Flying on a Jet Plane...

We are on our last leg to Cleveland, OH to see my brother and his family! You can see on my sidebar that the ticker says, "Today I see Julianne"! This is our little niece who is 16 months old. Our little guy is 13 months old and I think I am more excited to watch them play together than anything else.

Anyway, this post is really to let you know that I am on the plane and have wifi access. What the heck? I have never heard of such a thing. I just traveled 4 months ago and did not know this! Maybe it is only with certain flights and size of planes, but I think it is the best thing since apple pie or maybe an apple martini????

If I did not have my boys with me, I would have some great music on (instead of my 13 month old talking VERY loudly and my oldest singing to his headphones), surfing the net away in my own little dream land!

Speaking of a dream, parts of the day today, I have pretended it was next month and I was flying alone with only my hubby and we were on our way to the quiteness of the waves crashing on the shore in Mexico.....Oh well, love my family and will be super excited to see them as well!

Sidebar reads: 28 days until I am laying on the beach!!

Rung on the Ladder?

My last post led me to this post (it helps that MJ's "Man in the Mirror" is playing in the background). If you read my comment on my own post, in response to my brother, this is a little repitition.

One of my signature comments is "We do not all start off on the same rung on the ladder when we are brought into this world......my kids will never know what it is like to worry when their next meal is, but most of my client's this is primary worry". I joke that Zach worries about if he can have a third helping of Doritos, but in all honesty it is not funny.

Every single one of the families (I currently work with a higher risk population) that I work with are generally in financial difficulties.

A too common conversation that I have with client's is whether to pay the rent, the shut off notice to the utilities, or their fines. An even sadder decision is to take their kids to medical appointments in Seattle (3 hrs) or Spokane (2 hrs) or pay the rent. Yes, there are systems in place to help, such as rides to appointments or gas reimburesment, however let's remember, you have to have auto insurance to qualify for this government program. Insurance vs Rent vs Utility shut off notice vs fines.....which one would you pick??

One might ask, well they get "welfare" because I am paying for it with "MY JOB"....why dont' they get a JOB? Let me educate a little on "welfare"!! Average household (4-5 household size) amount equals: TANF (CASH) - 549.00, FOOD - 415.00, Free Medical (to which most doctors are not accepting new patients because they get paid such a small amount from the state), Subsidized Housing (fairly low rent amount due). So let's put a little SPIN on this, shall we! Get a job, well most of my client's do have a job, and guess what, they lose the 549.00 CASH, FOOD is cut to about 150.00, and their rent goes up 250.00 all because of the JOB they got at Wal Mart, which they NET 950.00 / month.

Now for those that their heads are beat red with anger, please bear with me! I am completely MODERATE in my political belief and definitely lean more RIGHT/CONSERVATIVE. I do NOOOOOOOOT believe that throwing tax payers money at the poverished through some of the programs out there is the RIGHT solution!!! I tested this, this past tax return season with most of my client's. All of my client's curently work and receive VERY LAAAAARGE tax returns, in the amounts of 6000-8000.

In December, I worked with every client to develop a thorough budget on how they would be spending this money. For all that complied, we came up with a game plan to pay all past due debts, collections, fines, AND a novel conept arose! What, you might ask???? Many of my client's were never taught how to pay rent EARLY, nor to put money AWAY in a SAVINGS in the case of an emergency. It was powerful to watch (some) client's "buy into" this system and actually have money when their car broke down to fix it. They were able to take money from their EMERGENCY FUND, rather than the payday loan store.

NO, I DO NOT THINK WE SHOULD THROW MORE MONEY AT PEOPLE IN POVERTY BECAUSE WHETHER IT 500-5000 DOLLARS, IF YOU ARE NOT TAUGHT WHAT TO DO WITH IT, IT WILL NOT MAKE A DIFFERENCE!!

You see, my client's are not much different than most of us that live in credit card debt. They, however go to the payday loan, where they are RIPPED off at a INTEREST rate that is through the roof, which is directly taken out of their next paycheck, leaving them no money to pay next month's rent, utilities, fines. They do not have the option to take out a home equity loan to "pay their debt" as so many Middle Class Americans do these days.

Yes, you read the references to "fines" frequently. People in poverty are more likely to commit crimes, act deviantly, drive under the influence, drive without a license. This behavior leads to arrests and fines (which I agree with)!

Remember, the above paragraphs about TEACHING. Most of the high risk client's I work with were taught by example as you and I.

The exception is the behavior that was "modeled" to some of my client's growing up: do drugs to cope, not pay your rent, have a pink slip on your door every month reading "3 days or vacate", steal cars, call the cops to solve your problems, flip off your enemies parents as they drive by, tell your teachers to F*CK off, don't go to the doctor because your mom can't get off of the couch from a hangover or can't ask for more time off from work at Wal Mart or she will lose your job (because she is considered a dime a dozen), taking the bus places, and the one that HURTS the HEART the most......

Watch other mom's hold their children close when you approach them because they do not want you playing with them.....INNOCENT children born on a lower rung on the ladder. This child is not told by their parents, "I can, I can, I can" as they approach the swimming block at a competitive swim meet, but I can tell you that I personally heard that from my dad every time.

The result, my parent's raised three very generous children, all in the helping profession: a school psychologist, a cardiologist, and a social worker/therapist. Yes, our lives were not perfect, which I think has been a strength, but something we always had were parents that loved us and BELIEVED IN US!

My point is instead of seeing yourself as so different from my clients, see what is common! We are ALL God's children! How flipping cool is that??? God loves us ALL so much and wants us to help our fellow brother and sister.

Jesus, thank you so much for teaching and showing me the struggles that people go through on a daily basis. Thank you for allowing me to teach my children this principle. Thank you for instilling a passionate love for people! Thank you for giving me the opportunities along this path you have so specially paved for me to be an amazing Social Worker/Therapist.....to give honor to you and share your word when appropriate with "my clients" because you are the Ultimate Healer, Protector, Strength, Teacher, and Love that they NEED! Whisper in their ear, "I can, I can, I can" as their Heavenly Father since their Earthly father never knew how.....


Rung on the ladder? To Jesus, we are all on the same rung.....

It read "YOU PASSED"

Having to select "Complete Exam" with the ENTER key for the LICENSED SOCIAL WORK exam was so nerve wracking. Actually, the past couple of weeks have grown more and more anxiety inducing. With this exam, it is really neat that you select submit and you INSTANTLY find out if you passed or not. While this is good, it is especially scary to know that you may or may not be able to take the next big steps in your life.

You see, ever since I was a Senior in High School, I have wanted to be in private practice doing therapy with couples, families, etc. I attended my Freshman year of college and in Psychology 101, Mr. Delich clearly said, "For those of you who think that you will be a PhD or doing private practice somewhere......think again, there will only be 1 person in this class who actually do it". Sometimes, I think God must have had me pay special attention to that statement, because it has been a driving force for me to be THAT person!!

Years ago, I wanted to help the very underprivileged and this meant dual diagnosis of Severe and Persistently Mental Illness collaborated with Substance Dependence. So, I studied intently on the clinical course of mental illness and even took one year between my Bachelors and Masters Degree to obtain a Chemical Dependency Degree. After working with this population for some time, I realized that burn out for other clinicians were quite HIGH! Therefore, I made the decision to be a little more eclectic!!

Choosing, eclecticism, is more challenging to me as well! I get to study and attempt to master many different genres of therapy. So, my vision at this time is to work with the following: Mental Illness (specializing in Depression, Anxiety, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, and Bipolar disorder), Marriage, Family, and Children (probably adolescent to teenagers, not so much interested in the little tike's-play therapy and such is not really my thing).

While reviewing for my exam, reading pages and pages of information I had forgotten, there was such a DRIVE and MOTIVATION to LEARN more.

My value for therapy at this time is:
Many people will give therapy 1-2 times with a different therapist, and if it doesn't work, then the they give up on the process! I want to be there for someone who crosses my door and they do not have to give up on the process, because they are seeing the changes they desire in their life. There is nothing like helping another and watching the "light bulb" go off when they are making connections to patterns in their thoughts, behaviors, childhood, etc. AND then giving the steps/actions to terminate or alter these!

Thanks for listening to me ramble on and on......

Independence Day!!

Happy 4th of July! We had a blast yesterday! The day started with a BBQ at our friend's house, great food, swimming, and the extreme heat. Luke is totally a water baby.....he did not want to get out! We ventured home around 4 pm to get a nap in for Luke (he was a little grumpy, but actually did very well considering no afternoon nap). He passed out and Zach played with his best bud, Riley from down the street. At about 7:30 p.m., the boys, Riley and I headed down to the local baseball league stadium for the fireworks show!

Zach and Riley crack me up at the precious ages of 10! Zach is pretty sure he is really cool these days and thinks he is getting away with something when he says something "sucks" or "doorknob"...don't ask me, it is something they say when something is dorky or whatever!

Luke was precious and soooooo well behaved. He sat in his stroller, kicking his legs to the music, holding dino, and eating some of brother's snow cone. Just before the fireworks show (2 hours later......oh my gosh, he has never sat in a stroller that long, especially when it is not moving), I picked up Luke and the booming and sparkling of lights began. He did reeeeeally well! His face looked a little in shock and at one point, he was holding me so tight and had a closed finger grip on my neck! The poor people in front of us had to listen to me saying "Yay....Yay....Yay" for quite awhile. Luke cried out one time and then it was quickly over. I placed his head against my chest, held the other ear and shielded his eyes. After about 3 minutes of this, he decided he liked the fireworks a lot and was up and smiling. Then he snuggled, I shielded his little ears, and he just gazed at the bright sky!! I held him tight and put my hand on Zach's leg.....it was really a special moment as their mommy!

I did not bring a camera and I feel awful because all I snapped were pictures of Luke because Zach was having a blast with Riley!!

Here are some shots from the 4th of July show! (pre-fireworks)

Luke is probably thinking, "without dino, I could have never made it through this night"

And the night ended at 11:44 p.m. when we drove into the garage....

Show Us Where You Live Friday....

It's that time again for Show Us Where You Live Friday brought to you by Kelly's Korner. I have to admit, I browsed my picture files to obtain pictures of our house!! So, no I did not prepare and go take beautiful pictures, edit them, place them in the most satisfying order....You guessed it, I browsed, selected, and hit UPLOAD FILE

Hope you Enjoy....all you get is the patio.....because that is all I could seem to find in the saved files!! Ha!

All the dirt spaces are filled in with grass now!

And just for fun, my oldest and I shoveling snow!

I was doing everything possible to get the baby weight OFF

Prayers for Our Friends....

Please take a little time to say a prayer for our friends, Mandy and Kyle regarding their little love bug Ava. No, she is not ill and is doing fairly well. However, Mandy is emotionally exhausted. Ava is just turning 3 weeks old and is inconsolable. They are trying all of the tricks of the trade, but she is just not resting.

The thing that breaks my heart is that the first 6 months of Luke's life were bitter sweet. He was our everything and we could not imagine life before him entering our family. However, they were very trying, emotional, anxiety filled days. You see, Luke not only had colic, but he was not diagnosed with reflux until he was over 3 months old. He literally SCREAMED so hard every time in his car seat that we simply did not take him many places. Every time we got the courage to go somewhere, after one errand, we were spent and ready to feel like you were going through the roof!! I think what is so hard is watching one of my best friends suffer through this, because colic and reflux is like suffering. You can no longer breastfeed your baby, you wake up every 3 hours to pump your milk, and then feed it through a bottle with a thickening agent, called "thickit". You dare to breastfeed on occasion, however he projectile vomits the entire feeding, thus now leaving him in pain, hungry, and now you have no milk supply. He would not sleep and was EASILY startled. If his arms so much as moved the first three months while he slept, it was all over. Thank God, seriously Praise God for answering our prayers and after many nights of hearing him scream, and every 10 minutes going in to calm him, wrap him up, and leave him again, only to have him Scream again, he finally learned to sleep at night on his own. This did mean, however that he NEVER slept during the day more than 15-30 minutes at a time....

I guess what I am saying is pray for our friends, Mandy, Kyle, and Baby Ava.....because we do not want them to have to go through any of this.

For those that have it much worse out there, such as baby Jonah, Bentley, Brayden and so many more, we are also still praying for you!!

Looks Who's Walking!!

Our little man has been taking 3-5 steps since before his first birthday on June 10, 2009.....however I did not call this walking as it just did not seem to "count" in my opinion.

Well, for the past two days, he is doing more walking than crawling! For Luke, the definition between the two are:

Crawling: A form of movement used to get to objects so that one can stand upright.

Walking: A form of movement used to get to places while already standing upright.....and an extra bonus.....all these adults freak out, clap, and cheer!!

Recap for Luke to look back on what he was doing at 12 months:

-Walking
-Talking words: dada, mama, bra (brother), ba (means: Sippy cup, ball, brother), caa (clock), go
-Dancing (especially to the wiggles and country music)
-Lots of pointing (this is funny and embarrassing, b/c you look at people, point, and say GO, all while scowling)
-Giggle
-Throw a tantrum (you are a pretty quick learner b/c you learned that throwing your body and head back on the floor can hurt your little head, so you now intensely look at us, throw your body back, AND gently lower your head)
-Throw your blocks at everyone (thanks auntie Sarah for those blocks for his birthday)

**I will add more later as I remember them!!

Mommy and Daddy love you soooooo much little jammos!!

(PICTURE/VIDEO TO BE ADDED AT A LATER MOMENT....only so much time until Luke wakes)